The Many Definitions of Pearls and Cucumbers
I asked ChatGPT, the AI chatbot assistant, "Have you ever heard of Pearls and Cucumbers?" This is what it had to say: Yes, Pearls and Cucumbers is an idiomatic expression that often refers to something rare or extraordinary (pearls) being paired with something familiar or ordinary (cucumbers). It's used metaphorically to describe an odd or unexpected combination of elements. For example, if someone were to say, "She wore pearls with her gym clothes," they might be implying that wearing pearls in such a casual setting is like pairing pearls with cucumbers—something unusual or mismatched.
This is why I keep telling my dad that ChatGPT is trying to take my job.
But I'll be honest. This AI-generated response gave me an idea for this article. The meaning of my name has always weighed on my heart. That Strikes The Oyster was one of the first times I delved into being called Pearl and how that has shaped me for 30 years. In an episode of the Pearls and Cucumbers Wellness Podcast, Soap and Water Give Me Powers, special guest Ativa and I talk about the meanings of our names and how much it fits our personalities. When asked, "Why call the blog Pearls and Cucumbers?" I defer to, "Well, my middle name is Pearl, and I like cucumber salad." Hence, the initial blog was titled Cucumber Salad. However, that was a detriment to those searching for cucumber salad, and I assumed my wellness blog would actually be at the top of that search.
My fiancé likes to tease at how inappropriate the name is. "Pearls? And Cucumbers? You're nasty, baby", he says. "You know what a pearl represents? I know you know what a cucumber could mean." It took me 2 years after the launch of the blog to completely grasp what he meant.
Most people that I feel brave enough to advertise myself to tend to have the same responses. "Oh, that's so cute. And your middle name is Pearl?! That's so cute." For a while, as a teenager, I rejected the notion of being called cute. It indicated a childishness or immaturity in my appearance or attitude. "You're so cute when you're mad," they'd taunt. So, I'd be lying if I didn't admit there was a twinge of annoyance at the idea of my wellness platform being called "cute."
And then there's this AI chat box that goes ahead and makes this name make sense in a way I've never thought of before. Something extraordinary being paired with something ordinary. The intricacies of my mental health journey being described within the monotony of everyday life experiences. A harrowing journey of self discovery and spiritual freedom as I describe the small acts of self care during a 9-5 workday in a nonprofit lorded by white bosses.
So why does it matter? How does the name encompass everything I'm trying to accomplish? What exactly do I hope to achieve?
During my sophomore year of high school, I learned the definition of the word "juxtaposition" - referring to the act of placing two things side by side, often for the purpose of comparing or contrasting them. Not to date myself, but over 10 years later, it still seems to be the word of the day. The juxtaposition of a string of pearls beside a bright green cucumber represents what, exactly? The duality of the pearls and cucumbers. The sexiness of it. The awkwardness of it. The juxtapositions of the pearls and cucumbers represent two sides of myself - the one I show and the one I hide. The duality of it comes to fruition in my writing. In my podcast. In my tears and my moans. While my fiancé is right in his definition, and ChatGPT is not far off with their definition, and even those in passing with a thousand different definitions, Pearls and Cucumbers is the collective journey of wellness.
While not every person on this planet may find themselves in the words of the light-skinned black girl from Jersey who likes anime and Broadway and Sade and wearing skirts and crop tops made from cut-up t-shirts, I have to believe at least one of us pearls will.
I ask myself once more, “What do you hope to achieve?” Community, mostly. An acknowledgment that we are not alone on this flying marble in space. That our feelings are valid and are meant to be felt and experiences and then dwindle away like most else.
I strive to create a community through Pearls and Cucumbers for us pearls and cucumbers. Create space for the feminine and masculine, the seemingly weak and observantly strong, and for the neurodivergent and the neurotypical. Understanding is the kindest act you can bestow on an individual. Empathy and actions based on that separate the ones who show up from the ones who are never around when you need them. I want to be there when you need me and when you don’t need me.
Why does it matter?
The same reason why Black Lives Matter matters. Not on the same scale, but same reason why All Eyes on Rafah matters. The same reason why “I’m here to help you” matters. We, as a human species, need to be there for one another. Like the gems from Steven Universe need to stick together, so do the rest of us.
The definition of Pearls and Cucumbers is connecting me with all of you. Cultivating a wellness space for those just trying to be well. Being at ease, as HeyFranHey would say. So, even when I don’t create content for weeks at a time, or you can’t relate to a specific experience, know this:
I will always find time to drop pearls for all you cute cucumbers.
